27/03/24 Rediscovering the Library
I went to the library today for the first time since I was a child. I'm on a mission to improve my mental health and to be more intentional with my activities, and it seems to be resulting in some steps back in time, like switching to a flip phone wherever possible (I can drone on about that in another post, though).
I'd say I've probably been reading somewhere between zero and two books a year for most of my teen and adult life. Like many people, I read a lot as a child, and it just fell by the wayside as I got older and had more responsibilities, or as I chose to spend my free time watching TV in an attempt to rest my brain. I'm sure you can relate to feeling like you have no mental energy after school or work to focus on a book. Focus is another thing in itself. I've felt as though it's become more difficult to focus over time, with reading being the kind of activity that requires a level of attention span I just don't have anymore.
I want to get back into reading because I miss how rewarding it felt. Long form content requires more thoughtful time and dedication before you get a payoff, and along the way, you can get engrossed in the story. I'm so used to short form content that I've lost the feeling of looking forward to things. When everything you consume is finished quickly, wrapped up within a matter of minutes, you miss out on the anticipation of reading the next chapter after work and you miss out on spending hours consuming something that has taken a more significant amount of time and thought to create in the first place. I want that back.
When I have read as an adult, it's been ebooks. I like the convenience and accessibility of them, but I find it hard to find new books to read that way, and I miss the feel of physical books, though I don't want to purchase them and clutter up my space any more than I already have. Going to the library today felt so special. I know I'm at the start of this process, and I might be a bit too keen, writing a blog post this early on, but I felt genuine joy and excitement being at the library. I got to browse the new arrivals as well as all the shelves for the genres I might be interested in (I need to rediscover my tastes since so much time has passed), and I got to pick up books with interesting covers, read their backs and flip through their pages. And then I got to take them home with me! Are you kidding? Libraries are awesome. I wish I hadn't forgotten that for all these years.